The magnificence that is my crochet handiwork

Don't hate me because I'm so immediately successful at crochet.

The 2nd grade Mother of Divine Grace curriculum suggests the student learn to crochet. It assists with small motor skills. In order to teach my son, I needed to learn how to crochet myself!
I read a little "how to" that came with the kit and watched a few YouTubes on how to crochet. Amazingly, that was all I needed!

First, I made this....
This "coaster" can actually hold two, yes...that's 2 beverages! And just to be clear, by that I mean I can place one beverage beside the other and they are BOTH still on the supersized "coaster"! I think I might be on to something.....
For my next project, again I started out just making rows and yet my natural talent shaped it into this...
See how it subtly comes in at the middle? Like a diaper, or an hourglass, perhaps a giant bowtie? it's truly a crowd pleaser! My daughter loves it and has found many uses for it. We're talking marketablility here, crossover...is that the term?
Finally, here is the piece d'resistance. Of this, I may become a dot.com business. Go ahead and click on this one to enlarge....You're going to want to see MORE of this one....

Buoyed by my previous work and the way those projects took on dimensions not dreamed of by others, I set out once again with the same formula. Just "trying" to crochet some straight lines, seeing if I could "do normal."

I've got to wonder if the shoemaker's elves did more with it whilst I slept because magically it seemed to take a chapeau shape! It rounded. It mushroomed. Certainly, by now you can see a dapper cap with a JJ Walker, Kid Dyn-O-Mite lid protruding. Good times!
We've all worn it and it has a "je ne sais quoi pas" quality on all of us, like the sisterhood of the traveling pants! Perhaps this is a sign that I should make homemade Christmas gifts putting more of these on more heads?!

Who knows what I'll make next? I have to keep busy at it just out of curiosity! You know what they say....Idle hands do the devil's work.

14 comments:

Kimberlee said...

Oh my goodness, that was so funny! I am laughing so much I'm going to wake up the baby - the hat is the best! Of course I'm laughing at your spirited writing - not your crochet. :-) When you're learning there's nothing for it but to count your stitches - every row! That will keep your rows even until you get the hang of it. just think - someday you'll be making lace mantillas and you'll look back at your humble beginnings with great merriment.

MamaMidwife said...

You. Crack. Me. Up.

Journey of Truth said...

This is funny! I lamely tried twice to learn this craft - I've decided to take a class from Michaels or someone who can do this extremely well and be patient with me on a REGULAR basis. You've done well, really! I can't even go back one - I can make the first row and then that's it!

Jenny said...

Do you accept paypal?

+JMJ+ said...

Hmmm...now would that Paypal donation be for merchandise or for my mental health fund? ;)

Nadja Magdalena said...

You are so funny...and your model/son is an awfully good sport!

This ought to be encouraging to my daughter who is just learning to knit and is frustrated that her knitting is less than perfect. Thanks for this post. And for the the sweet, self-effacing humor I have come to love in many of your posts.

Jamie said...

So funny!!! Thanks for the laugh, that coaster kind of looks like a foot, it was supposed to, right?

So what is the difference between knitting and crocheting? Which one is needed for making afghans?

Good effort, I want to learn too!!

Sorry to see you must have had some bad visitors, I know how that is....

Christine said...

I want to learn also. I bought everything....just need the time.

Laura O said...

You might have just inspired me to dig out my craft supplies! I have an unfinished hat to knit (and hope I can remember how since it's been over a year!)

Crochet is one thing I have not tried recently. Some ladies I know are convinced it is easier than knitting. Remind me someday to share about my learning to knit.....

AM said...

My friend you do beautiful work! I was considering getting a new mantilla, perhaps I can borrow yours?! I shouldn't tease you as I was considering using duct tape to hem an angel costume the other day! you are far braver than I!

Shelly said...

i love this post! Too funny!

;)

regan said...

crochet is funny like that. sometimes i do projects over and over again until i get it right.
just keep trying......=)

Annette M. Heidmann said...

Well if that isn't both hilarious and just plain brilliant. I'm off to teach my boy crochet - his fine motor skills need the work!! :-)

From The Pews said...

Ebay, Allison...Ebay!!!

You're not going to be able to keep up with the orders ;)

The coasters are a Must-Have!
Since they are jumbo-sized, one can use them for Super-Sized Slurpees.

The hourglass shaped masterpiece will be essential for all the dollies in the house.
They can also double-up as a Super-Hero/ine cape!

For the winters, the Chapeau is going to be a sure win!

I can't wait until you post your Youtube Instructional Videos ♥

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